What is Your Goal & How Do You Stay On Track?

Recently I did a presentation for the West End Business Association The topic was on creating partnerships and collaborations with other businesses, something I am very passionate about, in fact, in a previous career I facilitated the planning processes for many partnerships and collaborative projects for government departments, stakeholder groups, businesses, entrepreneurs to name just a few. 

One of the tips that I spoke about was the importance of your goals.  Many years ago my husband Christopher and I were in a sailboat accident, one that was almost fatal, and, changed my life. As we swam for hours trying to get back to shore, I became so aware and present to the fact that the only thing my brain needed to focus on was the shore line...my goal!

Many years later we were preparing to take friends sailing.  Part of getting ready to sail is preparation, and setting the sails.  You can see in this photo we had a sail malfunction. That malfunction while not major would impact our ability to maintain the course, sail with ease and resulted in us coming back to shore for some minor repairs. In business and in life, sometimes we have to return to the starting point to re-adjust, make minor repairs and then set back out on the journey.

Here are a few points from the business presentation I delivered....

GOAL- you need to know your shoreline.

People and Plan- you have to have a captain, a skipper. Someone needs to lead the team.  Then you must assign the right people to the right task.  Teach them the skills they need to know.  You need to have a plan. The plan begins with preparation and ends with preparation.  

Staying on Course- here is a safety line to keep you on course and on track:

.

T-  training

R-  relationships

A-  ASK

C- courageous dialogue and collaboration skills

K- kindness

As you set the sails for a new day in business, take a few moments to:

1) Know your shoreline

2) Set the sails and have a back up plan

3) Make sure you fill the boat with the right team and that roles are clear

4)  Be prepared to veer off course if the waters get rough

5) Ensure you have your safety line....just in case

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What sailing taught me about communication!

Communication and Sailing have something in common? Other than the fact people talk to one another and call out directions while on a boat? 

Believe it or not, there are quite a few things we can learn about communication and courageous dialogue from sailing.

When you are sailing, you must always know your shoreline, and where you are intending to go, your course. Similarly in communication, you must also know your shoreline, the goal for the communication, and where you hope to get to. That does NOT mean coming into the dialogue with an answer you try and lead people to but rather a goal of resolution, or a move forward plan, or a goal to be heard, or a goal to understand your client's needs. Know your shoreline.




Awe well, when you are sailing, whether can change in a blink of an eye, the same is true for communication. In one second the conversation can go off course, get heated and emotional or even end. You must become exquisite at understanding and reading the energy in the conversation and what is not being said (non verbal communication). These serve as two of a handful of warning signs that something is changing in the dialogue.



When the weather changes and the sailing gets rough, fear can set in. Fear changes how you respond/react, how you process what is happening, the choices you make to manage the situation, and ultimately what happens next. Typically a fear based response or approach to communication doesn't lend itself to resolution...instead fear based statements build defensiveness and trigger the survival instincts which cause people to say things they regret later. As Shawne Duperon, media expert, says "When knowledge goes up, fear goes down." You can manage your fear by being prepared and skilled. When you manage your own fear, the anxiety levels in those around you will also decrease.



And in sailing when the sailboat overturns, you must right the boat. The same is true in dialogue. When a conversation goes off course, you say something hurtful or offensive, or the conversation gets turned upside down or loses it shoreline, you must right the conversation. This can happen through an authentic sincere apology, a question of curiosity to understand what just happened, or a statement to respectfully get the conversation righted and back on course. The three actions that help you stay on course are: apologies, forgiveness (or self and others), and a move forward commitment and statement of hope.



These were some of the many tips I provided on a Tele Seminar about Courageous Dialogue and Conscious Communication, I was interviewed by Jenn August on the Wealthy Warrior Mindset series. You can access these free recordings by registering at: https://beyondbusiness.infusionsoft.com/go/wmwcall/a227/


To access your free Courageous Dialogue ebook ( a gift from me to you) go to:


http://tinyurl.com/charmainegift

http://tinyurl.com/charmainespecial



Until next time.... keep your communication sailing smooth

What I learned about business (and life) from sailing

Charting your course to workplace resilience

Charting your course to workplace resilience requires you to:

•           Know your shoreline
•           Understand how wind works
•           Set the sail and adjust with the wind
•           Watch the horizon for storms- telltales tell all
•           Know how to right the boat
•           And to have some fun

Christopher setting up the boat with our dog Toby patiently waiting... he enjoyed the water too!

My husband Christopher and I love to sail, although that was not always the case for me. About sixteen years ago we were in a sailboat accident that almost cost us our lives.  Swimming for our lives that day in the lake taught me a great deal about resilience, and I made some discoveries later about how similar sailing was to life and business.

When I coined the term Bounce Forward(TM) to define resilience (it is often understood as bouncing back) it was based on my big learning that I was not as resilient as I thought.  After our sailboat accident it took me almost seven years to get back on the boat. And a few more to actually enjoy it.

Bouncing Forward (resilience) requires us to:

1.           Know your shoreline- have your eye on the goal (always) and know your back up shoreline if the situation or plans change. In business your shoreline is your goal and overarching vision. That day in the lake, my shoreline was 4 ½ miles across the lake – the distance we had to swim to make it back alive if not rescued.
2.           Understand how wind works- in sailing you must know how the wind works, and understand to watch for wind changes by the colour of the water, differences in waves and by watching your sails. In business and life, wind happens...financial challenges, staff turnover, policy changes, new equipment and systems (some which drive you nuts), and stormy wind that is tough to get through. But, when you understand how the wind works, and how to sail through it, your team can follow your lead and stay afloat.
3.           Set the sail and adjust with the wind- in sailing you need to know how to set the sail, and of course adjust as the wind changes. The same is true in business. You must know how to choose the right course to reach the goals and manage the challenges, and then adjust as needed as change or new demands surface. In sailing, the more accurate the set of the sail, the better the journey.
4.           Watch the horizon for storms- telltales tell all. Our sailboat, a 20 foot Tornado Catamaran has huge sails with a 32 foot mast. You can imagine the size of the mainsail.  The sails are outfitted with telltales- a little piece of ribbon affixed to the sail which shows you how the wind flows along the sail.  When the sail is not set accurately the telltales flap about in the wind and do not lie flat and stream along the surface of the sail cloth. In life, and in business, there are telltales to look for (your gut reaction, warning signs, changes in team performance, etc). Use these telltales to help you set the sails in business and adjust as needed.
5.           Know how to right the boat – in sailing sometimes the boat capsizes. This happens in business and life to. Bouncing forward means that in these challenges we can ask for help, right the boat and get back on the journey with minimal drama.
6.           And to have some fun- this makes the journey worthwhile, and a lot easier to get back on the boat next time.

This story and these tips are part of my Bounce Forward keynote and seminar program.

Lessons From the Sailboat

On a recent interview with Nancy Ferrari, I talked about courageous dialogue and bouncing forward. Bounce Forward has four components:  Courageous Dialogue, Stress Management and Resilience, Teamwork by Design and The ASK.  These are four essentials to bouncing forward through life and business challenging times.  When Nancy invited me to share how I define the ASK, here is what I said:

ASKS that make a difference:

A- Ask for what you need, don’t assume, and be clear

S- skills- practice your ask so that it is clear, comfortable and you are confident

K-kindness to others and receiving graciously keeps the ask cycle going

Think of a few asks that you can use as your practice asks.  Maybe it is asking for help. Or advice. Maybe it is to help solve a problem.  When you ASK, it sets the stage in a relationship (e.g. a workplace relationship) for others to do the same of you.

Nancy also asked me about our "sailboat story". You may know this story already, especially if you have read my book On Toby's Terms or Bounce Forward, I talk about this near death experience, and it has also formed the basis of my most popular keynote presentation.  Years ago my husband Christoper and I had a near death sailboat accident. Swimming for our lives challenged my resilience in ways I had not thought possible. It was the true test of bouncing forward or back.  After we were rescued, and I had time to reflect, I discovered that to enjoy sailing again I needed to push through my fear of sailing and getting back on the boat.  In sailing, and in life remember...We can always change course, but we can’t get time back.

Fear also stops people from asking, and many times by the time you muster up the courage, the opportunity has gone.  You can always change course, just like we do in sailing, if things don't go well, but, you can't get back time and missed opportunities.

http://www.beachcitiesradio.com/on-air/wednesday/the-nancy-ferrari-show  June 20, 2012 Show Link
 
Happy ASKing!