Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Are you carrying a chip or a sack of rocks?

John A. Hannah stated “The greatest ability in business is to get along with others and influence their actions. A chip on the shoulder is too heavy a piece of baggage to carry through life.”

Carrying a chip on the shoulder will definitely impair one’s resilience and bounce forward abilities. It is tough to be resilient and carry a chip on the shoulder. We’ve all met individuals who seem to have a pretty big chip on their shoulder, perhaps in the form of anger, blame, grudge or grievance. Perhaps we have been this person at some time in our life.

A grudge or chip on one’s shoulder is often an indication that there is unfinished business. How can one resolve the business and get on with life grudge free?

· Consciously and intentionally make the decision not to carry a grudge or chip on the shoulder.

· Put the energy spent on carrying the grudge to carrying some form of resolution. If you cannot resolve it with the person, seek another way to resolve the issue and make a positive difference.

· Recognize that the past cannot be undone. It is what it is, so putting energy and emotion into creating a better future is a far better option.

· If in conversation with someone who holds a grudge turn the questions and blame from past to future. For example, if a person says “you shouldn’t have treated me that way.” Ask “how in future would you prefer others treat you?”

Instead of carrying a bunch of chips, which are like stones, stand atop of them, the load is much lighter and the view is far better!

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